You don’t have to look far to see how obsessed people are with looking good in the western world. And this is not restricted to one gender; Both men and women are in this business.
For a woman, it can be her clothes, makeup, body shape, hairstyle, skin color, and more. The general definition of how to look good to a man has also changed in recent years. With these requirements, it can often be difficult to distinguish between the two sexes.
It’s not enough to just wear stylish clothes or take care of your hair, it now includes personal hygiene, fake tanning, waxing and, in some cases, moisturizers.
And taking care of yourself is a sign of self-respect and self-love. Don’t feel ashamed or guilty about this. Those who feel good inside can also be seen in the way they dress and how they are presented on the outside.
This could mean that people in today’s world generally have more appreciation and self-esteem than in the past. And the reason people focus so much on looking their best is because of this inner change that is taking place.
But there is good looks and then you become obsessed with looking good. And in some cases some kind of obsession has gotten the upper hand. The natural and healthy need to take care of yourself has gone too far.
Great cover cover
One of the things someone can do when they are feeling a certain way is to go to the other extreme. For example, if someone feels that they are inferior or less than others, they can go to the other side of the spectrum and do the act of superiority and more than others.
The ego mind is working on the poles and that means there is no gray, the only thing it knows is black or white; This is why human behavior tends to be so straightforward.
And so her obsessive need to look good is used to cover up what’s going on inside her. It is an example of how the ego mind goes from one extreme to the other.
In order to understand or try to understand what the reasons for this obsession are, it is necessary to turn attention to the inner world. Since what is going on in the outside world is generally a mirror of what is going on in someone’s inside world.
So by looking good and going to extremes it allows you to regulate how you feel inside. The painful feelings that are experienced within are then pushed out of consciousness. If this process has taken long enough, you may not even be aware of these feelings.
And like any form of makeup, fake tan, or moisturizer, this process must be applied all the time. Because if you don’t look good, inner fears of being disapproved, rejected or abandoned could quickly arise. So it’s only natural that this whole process would be an obsession.
This is just one way the ego mind has to cover up painful feelings and emotions. Of course, by pretending that they do not exist, the feelings will not go away, but the pain will be masked for a short time and may no longer exist to the mind.
And while there may be some preference for the type of people who admire their looks, by and large it doesn’t matter who it is. A bit like someone who hasn’t eaten in weeks, any type of food is sufficient.
The ego-mind does not recognize from whom the acceptance or approval is coming. As long as it takes place, only that counts. Your own emotions and feelings are then regulated externally by other people.
So, on the one hand, it shows that this person is struggling to regulate their emotions and, on the other, that they have emotions that have been and are being repressed. Obsession is ultimately not good or bad, it is just one way to deal with these emotions. And since emotions are generally ignored in the modern world, one might get the impression that there is no other way to deal with them.
If they had the ability to regulate their emotions or seek other help with them and didn’t have the emotional build-up, then the need to look compulsively good probably isn’t there. Taking care of yourself would of course be there, but not in an extreme way.
Whether or not a person can regulate themselves emotionally often depends on the type of diet they received as a child. And if you are not regulated as a child, they are likely to have a lot of emotions that need to be repressed and pushed out of consciousness.
Two types of care
When it comes to creating a healthy child, and therefore an adult, empathetic care is the most beneficial form of care. This will usually involve a primary caregiver who is emotionally available and consistently responsive to the child’s needs and wants. In phases of emotional restlessness or restlessness, the child is mirrored, recognized, soothed and touched.
In this way, the child does not have to hide their feelings and improves their ability to regulate themselves. And feel safe to seek help from others when they get overwhelmed. A strong sense of self-worth can also develop.
When the caregiver is not empathetic, the caregiver is often emotionally unavailable and inconsistent when it comes to the child’s needs and wants. In extreme cases, they can even ignore them completely. Therefore, if the child is emotionally unstable, they are likely to be maladjusted, invalid, ignored, or even abandoned.
This can have serious consequences for both the child and the child’s growing up. It is then unlikely that the child will be able to regulate their emotions because they are not modeled on anyone. And that can mean that his feelings then have to be suppressed and denied. It is also uncomfortable to seek help from others when you are emotionally troubled. The person is unlikely to develop strong self-esteem; This can make someone more likely to seek acceptance and approval from others.
The above is a very general definition, and other factors will inevitably add to it; because some people have difficulties later in life or, for example, had a one-off unpleasant experience as a child. What it does, however, is to shed some light on what is going on on a deeper level for people obsessed with looking good.
It is inevitable that this person will experience emotional problems in adulthood due to the lack of emotional regulation and pressure as a child. This applies unless he seeks some kind of help, for example from a therapist or healer.
And when a person does not have a healthy relationship with himself and therefore does everything in his power to break away from who he is, it is natural for bonds to exist. But that’s just a sign of anxiety, and there are many more.