Harry Reflects ‘Pa Didn’t Hug Me’ – The Impact of Princess Diana’s Death on the Royal Family

Prince Harry, in his memoir “Spare,” has laid bare the emotional turmoil and profound sense of loss he experienced following the tragic death of his mother, Princess Diana. The memoir provides a candid account of the moment he learned of her death and the lasting impact it has had on his life and relationships, particularly with his brother, Prince William, and his father, King Charles III.

Princess Diana, known as the People’s Princess, died in a car crash in Paris on August 31, 1997. The news was delivered to 12-year-old Harry by his father while they were at the royal residence in Balmoral. Harry recalls the moment vividly, describing how Charles, struggling with his own emotions, told him the devastating news without offering much-needed physical comfort.

“What I do remember with startling clarity is that I didn’t cry. Not one tear. Pa didn’t hug me. He wasn’t great at showing emotions under normal circumstances, how could he be expected to show them in such a crisis?” Harry wrote, via The Mirror.

The young prince’s reaction was one of shock and disbelief. He describes feeling numb and unable to process the reality of his mother’s death. “I didn’t get up, I didn’t bathe, didn’t pee,” Harry recalled. He also admitted that he didn’t reach out to his older brother, William, for comfort, despite the intense emotional turmoil they both were experiencing.

In subsequent interviews, Harry has reflected on the difficulty he and William faced in publicly grieving their mother. During an interview with ITV’s Tom Bradby, Harry spoke about the surreal experience of walking outside Kensington Palace, meeting mourners who had come to pay their respects. “There were 50,000 bouquets of flowers to our mother and there we were shaking people’s hands, smiling… And the wet hands that we were shaking, we couldn’t understand why their hands were wet, but it was all the tears that they were wiping away,” he said.

Harry also shared a poignant memory of a gift he received shortly after Diana’s death—a small blue box containing a lock of her hair, given to him by his aunt Sarah Ferguson. This gesture, while intended to provide comfort, highlighted the deep sense of loss that has remained with Harry throughout his life.

The strain between Harry and William has been a significant focus in recent years. Once inseparable, the brothers’ relationship has deteriorated, particularly following Harry and Meghan Markle’s departure from royal duties and their subsequent criticisms of the monarchy. Harry has expressed a desire for reconciliation but acknowledges the challenges. “At the heart of it, there is a family, without question. And I really look forward to having that family element back. I look forward to having a relationship with my brother,” he said.

Royal expert Ingrid Seward offers insight into William’s perspective, suggesting that stability and structure are crucial for him. “William is sensitive, he likes structure and has perseverance. He does not give up easily. His relationship with brother Harry upset him more than he would care to admit. But he found it easier to cut ties rather than allow himself to be continually annoyed,” Seward told the Mirror.

The memoir “Spare” and Harry’s subsequent interviews paint a vivid picture of a family struggling with loss and the complexities of royal life. The emotional scars from Diana’s death have clearly influenced the paths of both Harry and William, shaping their relationships and their roles within the royal family.